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Text über Gandhi korrekturlesen

Frage: Text über Gandhi korrekturlesen
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Könnte vielleicht jemand meinen Text über Gandhi korrekturlesen?

Vielen Dank im vorraus.

Gandhis methods and principles of non-violence

For Ghandi non-violence wasn´t just a kind of passive resistance.
He saw it as a principle which claims victims, but it makes weaker people to the strongest ones.
In his opinion non-violence was the only possibility to achieve peace between all folks and races.
Without any forces he fought for the independence of India, which was occupied by the british at that time.
For instance, he organised a national strike. The outcome was, that nothing worked anymore. There drove no trains or buses, no stores were open and, which was most important, the telegraphs didn´t run. The british couldn´t contact people in their home country and became anxious. With this, Gandhi calls attention to the press all over the world.
Another time, he requested the people at an event to burn all clothes which came from Great Britian. It was a huge fire and the whole world gazed at it.
Many of the indian industries for clothes got bankrupt, because of the import of clothes by the British. Because of that, many people in India became out of work.
When he got back to london to discuss the independence of india, he visited the factory worker who fabricated the clothes.
Many of them became out of work because of the indian boycott.
But they understood Gandhi and liked him. He explained, that an unemployed person in India gets nothing, whereas british people get subsidies.
The worker liked the fact, that Gandhi visited them to explain his thoughts and aims.
In addition to this, it was something which they missed on their own politicians.

Another great appeal was, that he asked a group of Indians for burning their british passports, because they didn´t have the rights of the british.
He collected the passports of the people and threw them into the fire.
During that a policeman battered him, but he went on as long he was able to.
With this he hit the headlines and engaged peoples sympathy for it.

Probably the most spectacular action was the famous salt march in 1930. Gandhi proposed a non-violent march protesting the British Salt Tax. The Salt Tax essentially made it illegal to sell or produce salt, allowing a complete British monopoly. Since salt is necessary in everyone`s daily diet, everyone in India was affected. The Salt Tax made it illegal for workers to freely collect their own salt from the coasts of India, making them buy salt they couldn`t really afford.
The British post british soldiers in front of the salt works.
The Indians went up to them in little groups and the soldiers knocked them down with their clubs. Nobody struggled. They didn´t do anything.
The Indians found international favour and the British didn´t know what to do. How should they have fought against a non-violent but strong enemy?
For that purpose and because the British were weak from the second world war, India became independent in 1947.
When the hindus and moslems began to fight, Gandhi started to fast. He wanted to fast until the battles end. On the verge of his death the battles found an ending and he began to eat again.
Because of this methods of non-violence, Gandhi achieved more than any attack or war.

„There is no way to peace, peace is the way!“
Mahatma Gandhi
GAST stellte diese Frage am 04.03.2010 - 15:21


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Antwort von algieba (ehem. Mitglied) | 04.03.2010 - 16:11
He saw it as a principle which requires sacrifices (nicht gleich das erste nehmen, was im Wörterbuch steht), but it (wenn du das it stehen lässt, klingt es nicht mehr wie die Wiedergabe von Gandhis Gedanken und wirkt extrem irritierend) makes weaker people the strongest ones (to make sb. sth.: ohne Präposition).

In his opinion non-violence was the only possibility to achieve peace between all peoples (folks heißt umgangssprachlich soviel wie Leute) and races.
Without any forces he fought for the independence of India, which was occupied by the British (Nationalitäten immer groß) at that time.
The outcome was that (Nie! ein Komma vor that, das wie deutsches dass benutzt wird) nothing worked anymore. No trains or buses drove (Satzstellung: Subjekt, Prädikat), no stores were open and, which was most important, the telegraphs didn´t run. The British couldn´t contact people ...
With that, Gandhi called (der Text ist doch bisher im Past) attention of (call attention to = die Aufmerksamkeit auf etwas lenken und G. hat sicher nicht die Aufmerksamkeit auf die Presse gelenkt) the press all over the world.
Many of the Indian (s. oben) clothes factories got bankrupt (kein Komma) because of the import of clothes by the British. Because of that, many people in India became unemployed. (Du solltest einen besseren Zusammenhang zwischen den beiden Absätzen herstellen)
When he got back (wieso zurück? Wird im Kontext des Textes nicht klar) to London to discuss the independence of India (geographische Bezeichnungen auch immer groß), he visited the factory workers (das war bestimmt nicht nur einer xD) who fabricated the clothes.
Many of them became unemployed because of the Indian boycott (Hat er jetzt Arbeiter oder Arbeitslose besucht? Die Abfolge der Ereignisse ist nicht klar. Eventuell musst du dann auch mal Past Perfect verwenden).
But they understood Gandhi and liked him. He explained (s. oben) that an unemployed person in India gets nothing, whereas British people get welfare (subsidies sind Subventionen, das ist was anderes).
The workers (ist immer noch mehr als einer) liked the fact (s. oben) that Gandhi visited them to explain his thoughts and aims.
In addition, it was something which they thought their own politicians lacked.

Another great appeal was (s. oben) that he asked a group of Indians for burning their British passports, because they didn´t have the rights of the British.

Meanwhile a policeman battered him, but he went on as long he was able to.
With this he hit the headlines and engaged people`s (ist ein Genitiv) sympathy for it.

Gandhi proposed a non-violent march protesting against the British salt tax (die muss man nicht groß schreiben).
The British positioned British soldiers ...

For that purpose and because the British were weak after the Second World War (Kriege haben gerne Eigennamen, die dann groß geschrieben werden)...
When the Hindus and Moslims began to fight ...
Because of this methods (this is Singular und methods ist Plural, diesen Widerspruch musst du auflösen) of non-violence, Gandhi achieved more than any attack or war.

 
Antwort von GAST | 04.03.2010 - 16:16
Vielen Dank für deine Mühe, du hast mir sehr geholfen.


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Antwort von algieba (ehem. Mitglied) | 04.03.2010 - 16:24
Immer wieder gern. :D

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