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Englisch Aufsatz: "It started like an other day"

Frage: Englisch Aufsatz: "It started like an other day"
(3 Antworten)


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It started like any other day.Today was my friend`s eighteenth birthday.I was hurrying through the town to a shop, in order to buy a present.Having arrived to the shp,I slipped through the door.I frantically searched the shop to find a suitable present.
A short time later I came across an amazing smart phone."This is the perfect present", I thought.I decided to take the smart phone.Excitedly, i picked my way to the cashier.All of the sudden three robbers stormed the shop."All on the floor",one of the robbers yelled.Anxiously, I had hidden myself under a table.I longed to have a look at them.Their weaponary was impressive.The were carrying two semi-autimatic rifles and one of them had an apple grenade.Havinh understood the gravity of the situation, I pondered what to do.I had to think fast because one of them was inspecting the shop for hostages.I spotted that I had the smart phone.I quicly dailed the number of the police .To my relief, they had been already informed and had sent an operational command to the shop.After a little while the command had arrived.The police blocked the whole area.It was really bizzare.The robbers gave up without resistance.The police arrested them and took them to the police station.When it was safe ,I left my hideout.I was amused to see that everyone haf left the shop.Knowing that I left the shop without paying my friend`s present.Later that day I arrived to my friends party.He liked his present and I had a great story to tell him.

(Bitte achtet auf die Tenses ,die ich benutzt habe ,vielelicht sind sie ja falsch.Sie können auch etwas ändern oder hinzufügen ,wenn Sie Lust haben.Danke im Voraus)
Frage von bizepsschwabo | am 16.04.2016 - 19:50


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Antwort von LsD | 16.04.2016 - 19:57
It started like any other day.Today was my friend`s eighteenth birthday.I was hurrying through the town to a shop, in order to buy a present.Having arrived at the shop,I slipped through the door.I frantically searched the shop to find a suitable present.
A short time later I came across an amazing smart phone."This is the perfect present", I thought.I decided to take the smart phone.Excitedly, I went to the cashier.All of the sudden three robbers stormed the shop."All on the floor",one of the robbers yelled.Anxiously, I hid myself under a table.I longed to have a look at them.Their weaponary was impressive.They were carrying two semi-autimatic rifles and one of them had an apple Apfel? grenade.Having understood the sincerity of the situation, I pondered what to do.I had to think fast because one of them was inspecting the shop for hostages.I realized that I had my smart phone with me.I quickly dailed the number of the police .To my relief, they had been already informed and had sent an operational command to the shop.After a little while the command had arrived.The police blocked the whole area.It was really bizzare.The robbers gave up without resistance.The police arrested them and took them to the police station.When everything was safe ,I left my hideout.I was amused to see that everyone had left the shop.Knowing that I left the shop without paying my friend`s present.Later that day I arrived to my friends party.He liked his present and I had a great story to tell him.

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Antwort von bizepsschwabo | 16.04.2016 - 20:01
Danke Vielmals!


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Antwort von Zal | 16.04.2016 - 21:51
Ich würde statt "...the sincerity of the situation", "...the seriousness of the situation" bevorzugen. "Sincerity" leitet sich oft zur Aufrichtigkeit ab, was nicht passend zur Situation ist (Raubüberfall).

Bzgl. "apple" grenade, so sollte "hand grenade" genügen.

Sonst auch inhaltlich angenehm zu lesen.

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