Lord of the flies(Jack) Vortrag

Hallo ich muss bald einen Vortrag über die Person Jack aus dem Buch "Heer der Fliegen" halten und wollte fragen, ob jemand meinen Text korrigieren könnte?
Ich würde mich sehr freuen und schon mal vielen Dank im voraus.

Mein Text:
Now we come to the characterization of Jack.
(mit der Klasse arbeiten:)
Often you can characterize a person outward an internal.
And this is what we want to do now . But first we need some information which we can look on. (welche wir betrachten können) Please open your book at page 18 and look at line 20. Is there anybody who wants to read it? Only to line 29. Okay thank you for reading. Now we need someone who comes to the blackboard an make a small chart. With the two subdivisions(Unterteilungen) we spoke some minutes ago. (einen aufrufen) Who has any ideas we could write in the chart? (Tabelle mit den Schülern ausfüllen) Okay now we habe many outward things and I have to say, that there was not many internal things written but maybe you know some character things(?) on your own since anyone of you read the book. Thank you I think this are much the same things as I found out. Now I want to explain my opinion of Jack.

From my point of view Jack is a person who represents evil and violence in the book.
Outward(äußerlich?) he is a normal boy with red hair, frackels and a black cap. But his character shows a kind of the dark site of human nature. From the beginning of the book Jack has a lot of control and self-esteem issues, he speaks his mind and turns to violence when he does not get his way. Jack goes after Piggy from the start because Piggy is weak and so he show to the other boys, who is the leader. He continually challenges Ralph`s authority, drawing attention to himself as often as possible. Jack quickly realizes that, with no adults on the island, he can drop what few "civilized" traits he has and embrace the sociopath that he was always meant to be. By the end of the novel Jack`s dream became true. He has set himself up as sort of a king, "Jack, painted and garlanded, sat there like an idol...."(page....) But his ruthlessly manner(rücksichtlose Art) when he pursues Ralph he blocks himself, because of a momentous(folgenschwerer) mistake to which it only came because of his Greed for authority.(Gier nach Macht)

Jacks position in the book /used to being a leader
Imagine you are on this island as the character „jack“. What would you do to became the leader of the whole group. Who of you would rob the thinks of the week boys or kill some boys to be the leader? And who of you would be friendly and help the people and would try with this traits to became the leader? …..Now you can see that everyone of you would chose the friendly way but Jack chose the brutal way and how he still became the leader I will explain now. Jack only is the leader of the elite school group, but from the beginning he acts as a leader for the whole group. In contrast to Ralph, jack ties to to get the attention from the others by hunting, having fun and the power which jack has because of his brutal character. But quickly the others realize this. (Jacks group only hunts and has fun). This attracts almost all the others that have not yet joined the hunting tribe, leaving only a few to manage survivals on Ralph`s side. As more boys enter the tribe, Jack`s power seems to increase. Whatever belief enters Jacks mind, the others will follow and obey with no question. He ist the only boy on the island who does not follow Piggys ideas which once formed democracy throughout the novel, have now turned to dirt. This gives them the illusion that Jack is never wrong and can handle the role on being a "sole-leader". Jack`s tribe then kills Piggy an he "brainwashes" the others into believing that Ralph`s group is boring and wrong. This is what sets all the others out to kill Ralph at the end. And with this Jack has reached his goal, being the leader of the boys on the island.
But in my opinion, Ralph`s society would have been the best route to take, „as democracy is governed by the people, for the people, and with the people.“

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