Erörterung kontrollieren, bitte

Hallo!

Hab eine Erörterung in Englisch geschrieben! und jetzt wollte ich fragen, ob ihr sie durchlesen und mir verbesserungsvorschläge sagen könnt.
oder mich auch irgenwo korrigieren!



Thema:
Should Austrians schools introduce midterm holidays in autumn?

For several weeks it has been intensely discussed whether autumn holidays should be introduced in Austria or not. Not only politicians and teachers disagree, but also the students themselves. Should the long summer holidays be reduced and one week of autumn holidays be created, or should everything remain as it is?

My first argument for autumn holiday is, that students can recover from school stress. The school beginns in September and the autumns holidays would be at the end of October or at early November. From September till the Christmas holiday, students have a lot of exams. And so this period should be diveded in two parts by the autumn holidays.

Furthermore students, who need more time for studying, can use the autumn holidays for learning. Also good students can take an advantage of this holiday week, because they have one week for relaxing, learning or doing what they want.

Another aspect is that the whole tourism branche is able to go on their own holidays. For example in the summer or winter holidays it isn’t possible to go on vacation for hoteliers because this time is the main season for tourism.

On the other hand I think the everyday school life gets interrupted and so the students could get out of the rhythm of learning. Some of the students could get problems with this break and this could lead to worse school achievements.

Another problem is, that a lot of parents haven’t holidays in this time. In this case younger children would be alone at home. To avoid this, the parents have to look for a nanny.

According to my argumentation you can see that I have more pro- than contra-arguments. But the pro are not so severe than the contra-arguments and so in my opinion I don’t want autumn holidays, because I think it only interrupt my rhythm of learning.



Danke für eure Verbesserungsvorschläge!