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Mediation - bitte korrigieren

Frage: Mediation - bitte korrigieren
(2 Antworten)

 
Hallo, ich brauche mal Hilfe bei einer Korrektur (besonders Satzbildung, ob sich was nicht gut anhört oder falsch ist und ob Kommas richtig gesetzt sind oder welche fehlen), weil ich mir manchmal etwas unsicher im englischen bin. Ich habe eine Mediation geschrieben und sollte das Projekt Hallig Hooge erklären und schreiben, ob ich dafür bin oder nicht. Und wisst ihr wie ich den oberen Teil also die eigentliche Mediation noch etwas kürzen kann? Es ist doch zu viel geworden, da die ja nur 1/4 vom Text umfassen soll. Das fiel mir aber etwas schwer. Würde mich über Hilfe sehr freuen, weil ich mich ziemlich angestrengt habe und nicht so gut in sowas bin.


Dear Ryan, how are you? I hope that you are fine. I heard that you are interested in doing voluntary work after leaving school. I would like to tell you something about a project on Hallig Hooge, that is about voluntary work.
The project on Hallig Hooge, an island in the North Sea is for people between 18 and 80 years. Hallig Hooge is a little island, where about 100 people live in 10 mounds. (Warften)
If you want to do voluntary work on this island, you have to stay for 2 months, at least. You can live in community-owned apartments. In summer you have diverse possibilities for employment. For example, you can mow lawns, brush benches, repair fences and pluck weeds. In winter the possibilities are less than in summer. Usually, you work im offices. In the tourism office, you will be sitting at the desk from 10 am for 4 hours and doing press work, telephone services or cooking coffee. For the rest of the day you can make good use of nature walks, where you see more sheep than humans. But the leisure facilities and the infrastructure are very limited.
If you are interested, you have to know that, each month 10 - 15 applications are submitted and only three sets can be awared in parallel. Not all people can get a seat. Decisive are the copcity and qualification.
I think it is a very good project for people who like these kind of yobs and the nature. I do want to apply for it, because it is a very good experience and you can learn a lot. This work can make you independet, because you do not live with the parents anymore and have to learn to do more things alone. It ist a good way to bridge time, If you do not want to study yet. You can make new impressions and meet new people. In addition, as a voluntary worker you are committed to good things and it looks very good in your CV. But one the one hand you have to look, if you would like to live in the nature, because it is much different than in citys. One the other hand, it can be good for your mind and body, because you are around of fresh air, nature and you have much more time for yourself and less stress than in big citys. You also have to look, if you are a person who likes the work in nature and office.
All in all, it is a really good project und you can see something new from the world and get new impressions in a good way. But you have to look if you have the right qualifications and like to be around with less people and much nature.
What are you think about that? Would you want to apply for it? Im looking forword to hearing for you.
Best wishes,
Marina
ANONYM stellte diese Frage am 13.10.2018 - 20:42


Autor
Beiträge 1
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Antwort von clarabellstedt | 13.10.2018 - 22:37
project on Hallig Hooge, that is about -> Komma weg
between 18 and 80 years -> besser: between the age of 18 and 80 years
island, where -> Komma weg
work on this island, you have to stay for 2 months, at least -> Komma weg! und: you have to stay for at least 2 months (du hast den Satz zu verdeutscht)
In winter the possibilities are less than in summer.
-> besser: You have fewer possibilities in winter.
office, you -> Komma weg, verdeutliche dir nochmal englische Kommaregeln, man nimmt sie kaum, werde keine mehr hier aufführen, aber fast alle können weg
where you will/ going to see more… musst nochmal nach deutschen Satz gucken
das but macht null Sinn im nächsten Satz! da kein Zusammenhang zum vorhergehenden- besser Though!
And I can learn a lot oder I will be able to learn a lot
your parents
than living in cities
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT!
hearing from you

Das sind nicht alle Fehler, falls es dir benotet wird, würde ich mir bei den Sinn einiger Sätze vor Allem am Ende nochmal Gedanken machen


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Beiträge 4
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Antwort von Riri28 | 14.10.2018 - 09:05
Kannst du mir sagen welche Sätze keinen Sinn ergeben und falsch sind? Wenn du nicht willst musst du sie auch nicht kontrollieren, aber dann weiß ich welche ich ändern muss. :)

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