Wäre nett, wenn jmd korrigieren würde

hallo leutz ich wäre euch sehr dankbar,wenn ihr meinen text korrigieren könntet :-)))

RE: Students and their first year

Sir Will Lee,

In your article of 20.08.2000 "I`m broke and hungover.
Well, I`m a student" which was published in The Observer you mostly write about the day of a student.

I as a reader expects that you had reported more of the study and the actual work in the university.
Unfortunately it is mainly reported about the nightlife.
Your article gives me the feeling that you want to make oneself ridiculous about the studtent life.
If you are really aware that this article could transmitted to the future students a false image of the study and the university?
I have noted with disappointment that you do not even be concerned about it.
Personally i find your article very pejorative with respect (regard) to student life.
You could write your report very differently.
It is all aware that the student life is different of a normal student life on the highschool.
Of course, the students learn with the step in the university many other things to know. You learne new people to know and also the nightlife arouses more curiosity in one. But i find your presentation of the things not qualitativ enough.
The reader learn abot your money problems in your article. I think that it is not important to refer it. The money problems are not originated because of studies but rather because you are mainly dedicated to the nightlife than your actual tasks.
But above all, you as an ex-student should be give council on the way to the future students.
I personally would have preferred it to warn young people that study is not to be taken lightly. It is worth stating at this point that the study is really serious and disciplined work.
It is also important to mention that we do not pursue this path because the family wishes so, but we should make the desicion of study of their own interest.
Fortunately not many people have the same attitude toward the university and the related responsibilities as you.
All the information you get from your article shows that yo have a totally wrong attitude and have had a hge mistake in your ideas which means that you were asked to leave the university.
All in all, I am of the opinion that the reader gets more informed about your adventure stories at night, but no helpful information regarding the university or study.
I hope that yo write your next article with care and try to give the reader a helpful advice on their way.